If you’re out of the loop, read part I before continuing.
After consuming a highway restaurant burrito (it was excellent, and the first of many for me since I’ve been in the Southwest), Matt and I continued on what was soon to be named the Crazy Train.
Since we had left LA, Deb and Bonnie had had a few run-ins with other riders, nothing major, but enough to switch seats a couple times. Deb was convinced that someone kept kicking the back of her seat (including Matt) and Bonnie… Bonnie was in another world. Matt and I had relocated a couple rows back to seats with more leg room, giving us a good vantage point for the fun that was about to ensue. (It also placed us in front of a man wearing a plastic bag on his head, but that’s neither here nor there).
An incident between Bonnie and an older man (we’ll call him Archie) started the fun.
Bonnie and Archie had a run-in earlier, when Bonnie (during one of her seat changes) sat down next to him, causing a small argument. Overall, no big deal. Later, on her way to the bathroom, however, she began yelling at Archie. The exchange went something like this:
Bonnie: Don’t hit me!
Archie: I didn’t hit you, you bumped me!
Bonnie: And then you hit me!
Archie: Sit down before I slap you!
Bonnie: So you already hit me, now you’re going to slap me!
Archie’s seat mate tried to tell Bonnie to settle down and go back to her seat, which led to a string of expletives to the seat mate, Archie and anyone else who would listen. Bonnie then took her rage to our driver, telling him that she wanted the police called because Archie had put his hands on her. The driver, aware that Bonnie had been causing problems throughout the ride, told Bonnie to sit down and be quiet. Bonnie, obviously not happy with this, went on a “F- you” laced tirade (directed at the driver and everyone else on the bus), including the line: “Is there anyone here brave enough to say that he threatened to slap me?” She then took the law into her own hands, calling the police, which necessitated the bus driver to pull over.
The view of the Arizona desert is lovely. It looks something like this:
After waiting at mile marker 76 for a short time, the driver yelled “All Aboard” (ironic, as it is the first words in Ozzy Osbourne’s classic, “Crazy Train”) and drove us to mile marker 81. Bonnie was not happy with this either, as the police told her they would meet us at mile 76. When we pulled over to 81, she demanded to be let off the bus. The driver allowed her off and she began walking back the five miles to mile 76. And that, my friends, is the last we heard of Bonnie.
End of the fun? Not a chance. Part three features the return of Deb and a taxi ride from Phoenix to Mesa.